Whirling as performance

The moment I start whirling in front of an audience, I can only go one way and that is inward. I can only concern myself with me and my experience of stepping around my axis.
It is a vulnerable and at the same time very powerful experience. Vulnerable because this movement is about intimacy with my deepest core as I share it by being visible to others. A wondrous contradiction, and yet it feels right.
I encounter my judgments and fears, physical discomforts. It’s all even more extreme in front of an audience, as if everything is magnified. It takes me an enormous amount of courage and a kind of warrior mentality to stand there. With willpower I adjust, and speak to myself: just quietly step through and feel what emerges: I am good the way I am.
At some point my heart opens and I perceive the world through my feelings, my head is crystal clear, but not in control. I follow the pulses of my body and let myself be carried by the sounds of the music, the rustling of my skirts, the feel of the wind on my skin. Open in the moment, not knowing what is to come.
The spinning creates a vortex, releasing energy that I otherwise have less easy access to. I feel like a portal or instrument through which life speaks through movement.
I perceive, I receive, I am amazed. The space I enter is so beautiful, grand, loving, light! I feel like a child, simple, happy and grateful that I get to play in this playground of Life. I feel the goodness of life flowing and can freely play with the available sounds/vibrations in the space I am in. Here I can be completely myself, in love with ongoing movement and the vast diversity of possibilities that lie before me.
I really get great joy from sharing this experience with spectators: in doing so, I give myself the opportunity to share something of my core that I have not yet found another expression for.